Choice Words

deckchairs-355596_1280On the last page of InStyle magazine, there is a brief article called, “I am That Girl.” Each month a different female celebrity is interviewed. In the August 2016 InStyle, the actor, Tracee Ellis Ross was interviewed. Tracee is an “outspoken” feminist, according to the article, but I found such a connection to the words she spoke that I had to share.

When asked, “What do you do when you lose hope?” (about the lack of progress of feminism) she replied, “I ask myself, ‘How do I take my frustration and translate it into something that actually helps the situation?'” Wow! Why can’t those words be used for any situation that causes frustration? Like chronic pain or illness? For example, when I get frustrated I could share with my blog readers or I could journal or talk to an empathetic friend. When I was a kid, my mother would tell my sisters and I to “go suffer in silence” when we weren’t feeling well. But by sharing my pain, discomfort or frustration with others I am able to let others know that they are not alone in their suffering and reminds me that I have wonderful readers who understand what I’m feeling.

The interviewer asked Tracee “What do you wish you knew when you were younger?” She answered, “That I was enough. . .I used to think there is a right way to look, there is a right person to become-then I got stuck.” How many of us face feelings of being “stuck?” Life didn’t turn out the way we thought it would. It’s easy to see ourselves as less than whole because of our physical limitations. Yet each of us is enough; we are whole individuals with likes, dislikes, intelligence, beliefs and ideas. Neither pain nor illness defines who we are.

Then there was the question, “How do you deal when you don’t feel 100 percent? Tracee answered, “I accept it. Acceptance does not mean you like it. It means that you agree this is what it is. Once you have that, you can step forward.” This response was related to not feeling like she is “enough,” but it is also a great response to not feeling physically well.  We can take a moment to accept that we are having a bad day, week or month and even accept our feelings about how bad our pain and/or illness is. Then we can move forward. As I am reducing the Lyrica (see Still here. . .), I’ve had quite a few rough days and I’ve been practicing acceptance to get through those days. I first acknowledge that I feel remarkably awful, accept that I won’t be able to workout that day, then move forward towards what I can do. Maybe a little yoga? Maybe making a piece of jewelry? Maybe just some coloring. . .

That’s all for today! I just had to share my thoughts on this article. All the best to each and every one of you.

Deb

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Still here. . .

rose-174817_1920I don’t quite know what is going on with me. What I do know is that I’ve had complete writer’s block when I usually am so eager to post on my blog. I’ve tried, yet seem unable to write a coherent post.

I’m wondering if I bit off a bit more than I could chew with starting to exercise while trying to withdraw from Lyrica. I’m not going to lie; it’s hell getting off of Lyrica. My doctor is on board with me stopping it and is lowering my dosage slowly and carefully. However, each decrease results in days of nausea, diarrhea, body aches, sweats. chills, weakness and a powerful headache. It then takes more days/weeks to regain my strength.

I’m definitely not losing my courage. I can see and feel improvements in my body with each decrease. Last night I realized that the fluid retention has been reduced to the point where I recognized my feet and ankles for the first time in years!

Julie’s last two posts on Counting My Spoons have been about acceptance and making changes. As I was reading her blog, I realized that acceptance does not mean complacency. Recently I’ve needed to make changes to the medications I take and in the way I understand and accomplish self-care. Working out is difficult and uncomfortable when you haven’t exercised in 12 years. Getting off of meds (yes, there are a few I don’t need anymore) that you’ve relied on for many years is also difficult and uncomfortable. Yet, I know with certainty that these are the things I need to do for my health.

I guess I can’t really say I bit off more than I could chew. I’m listening to my body and giving it what it needs right now and of course that affects my mind and emotions as well. To say I have brain fog is putting it mildly. Hopefully, this post is the end of this difficult and uncomfortable writer’s block I’ve had. Please stay with me as I go through this time of transition.

Deb